Easter is so disappointing. You suffer all the way through lent, and what do you get for it? A ham.

It's better to be burnished with use than rusty with principle.

I grew up in a fundamentalist protestant family that stressed that we were a select people and so we were to avoid contact with others who did not share our faith.

A compassionate conservative is someone who electrocutes juveniles but lets them have a last 'make a wish'.

When it comes to finding available men in Minnesota, the odds are good, but the goods are odd.

Being Lutheran, Mother believed that self-pity is a deadly sin and so is nostalgia, and she had no time for either

He was admired for never being at a loss for words and never wasting any either.