In the end, all solutions are temporary.

The thought of people in this day and age sitting down to listen to a radio variety show on Saturday evening is rather implausible and was even more so in 1974 when we started “A Prairie Home Companion.” Thank goodness Minnesota Public Radio was too poor to afford good advice or the show never would've got on the air. We only did it because we knew it would be fun to do. It was a dumb idea. I wish I knew how to be that dumb again.

Give guilt - the gift that lasts forever.

When you're old you feast on your memories, and if you spend too much time on exercise, you may get old and not have many.

She gave him such a look... Man oh man, if looks could kill. That one might have totalled a city block.

Pumpkin pie is a living symbol of mediocrity. The best pumpkin pie you ever ate wasn't all that much different from the worst pumpkin pie you ever ate.

My ability to keep cool in a crisis is based entirely on not knowing all the facts.