I sometimes throw in a couple of swears just to keep the Christian right off my tail. I wouldn't want to be the tea party's go-to comedian.

I always wanted to make strangers and friends and family laugh. I was over ten years younger than my brothers. It was hard to get attention without some kind of gimmick, like athletic stardom or being funny.

Every cookie is a sugar cookie. A cookie without sugar is a cracker.

The popcorn button on the microwave is a miraculous invention. More miraculous than even the microwave itself.

I really shine in front of prominently Jewish crowds. Normally I really beat myself up, but as far as Jewish audiences go, I'm at the top of my game.

I think everything is fair game to a certain extent.

My brother is a tax guy, and the way I look at it, it's like he's spending his life saving money for rich people. So I think making strangers laugh, at least having a creative component to your profession, is more manageable for me. I can live with that a lot easier.