The definition of the word nerd has changed. It's now any attractive person with a hobby. The loneliness component is no longer included.

I think everything is fair game to a certain extent.

What I need is an Urban Thesaurus. I know what money is what I need is 600 different ways to say it.

Do you know what Bill Gates has to pull out of an old coat, to feel like I did with a $20 bill? First of all, the idea that Bill Gates has an old coat is preposterous. If he has an old coat, it's the coat Abe Lincoln was shot in and he wears it as a bathrobe - no underwear by the way. He lets his billionaire balls swing willy-nilly beneath the death cloak of the great emancipator. That's your 1%.

Rich people are just like us though they now eat their meals off square shaped plates.

I went to Boston College. It's a Catholic college, yeah I had a nickname there: Jew.

I just can't dance like no ones watching. I tried but it's futile.