The medical profession (is) a conspiracy to hide its own shortcomings. No doubt the same may be said of all professions. They are all conspiracies against the laity... (U)ntil there is a practicable alternative to blind trust in the doctor, the truth about the doctor is so terrible that we dare not face it.

English is the easiest language to speak badly.

For nearly twenty years I have been a published author... But I have never yet seen a book of mine offered for sale in a shop window.

Property, said Proudhon, is theft. This is the only perfect truism that has been uttered on the subject.

The only person who acts sensibly is my tailor. He takes my measure anew every time he sees me. Everyone else goes by their old measurements.

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller.

The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essence of inhumanity.