Never fret for an only son, the idea of failure will never occur to him.

A drama critic is a man who leaves no turn unstoned.

All progress means war with society.

In order to fully realize how bad a popular play can be, it is necessary to see it twice.

Patriotism is a word which always commemorates a robbery.

Every man to whom salvation is offered has an inalienable natural right to say 'No, thank you: I prefer to retain my full moral responsibility: it is not good for me to be able to load a scapegoat with my sins: I should be less careful how I committed them if I knew they would cost me nothing.

I was told that my diet was so poor that I could not repair the bones that were broken and operated on. So I have just had an Xradiograph taken; and lo! perfectly mended solid bone so beautifully white that I have left instructions that, if I die, a glove stretcher is to be made of me and sent to you as a souvenir