Do not try to live forever. You will not succeed.

My main reason for adopting literature as a profession was that, as the author is never seen by his clients, he need not dress respectably.

As I write, there is a craze for what is called psychoanalysis, or the cure of diseases by explaining to the patient what is the matter with him: an excellent plan if you happen to know what is the matter with him, especially when the explanation is that there is nothing the matter with him.

The roulette table pays nobody except him that keeps it. Nevertheless a passion for gaming is common, though a passion for keeping roulette tables is unknown.

People get tired of everything, and of nothing sooner than of what they most like.

Taking all the round of professions and occupations, you will find that every man is the worse for being poor; and the doctor is a specially dangerous man when poor.

War does not decide who is right but who is left.