Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
George CarlinI believe myself to be a worthwhile and inventive performer in my own right. But I'm not in a league with Lenny [Bruce], certainly not in terms of social commentary.
George CarlinWhen you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat.
George Carlin