We now buy watches primarily for their looks, price, or additional functions. The fact that they tell time seems lost.

If a movie is described as a romantic comedy, you can usually find me next door playing pinball.

Religion is sort of like a lift in your shoes. If it makes you feel better, fine. Just don't ask me to wear your shoes.

I'm in shape. Round is a shape.

Suddenly, I was thirty, very unhappy entertaining people in their forties, and here came a group of people in their teens and twenties who had similar anti-authority problems and similar dreams and wishes, hopes for mankind. So I gravitated toward them.

I literally didn't know my father. My mother had been a secretary, and after she and my father split, she went back to work for an advertising executive. So my older brother and I were "latch-door kids." We went home for lunch and after school by ourselves.

People always tell me "Have a nice day." Well what if I don't want to? What if I want to have a crappy day?