Obama is the closest thing to a Latino that we have. Barack. Everybody wants to see his birth certificate too.

It's a great day in America when white people, black people and Latinos can all come together and pick on another minority.

I actually graze at several of the homes while Im playing. There a lot of food going on. I drink and eat and use the restrooms in a lot of the houses. What better way to really get closer to the fans than to steal their soap from the restrooms as they allow you to enter their homes?

I think we all feel the same things most of the time, we just don't know how to put it into words. When I'm on stage, I say it. The truth makes people laugh.

80% of the women who were asked if they fake orgasms said yes. Actually, they said Yes! Oh God, Yes!

We need to get better at voting and be a voice for the people who do not have one.

I think it's easier for African American and white comics to be praised than it is Latinos because they think our culture or our humor is substandard. I mean, I just don't think they want to give us credit. I just don't think that they see us as important enough to be at their level. I'm the longest-produced comedy at Warner Bros. and I don't feel special. They come over and say hello. But everybody's gonna make a lot of money and I don't feel like I'm special to them.