Do I have more depth than I'm given credit for? No!

I was a failed actor but I still wanted to show off, so I ended up doing live comedy.

I'm often dating people, but I don't say it because you sort of know it won't last long.

The only time I took Ecstacy was years and years ago. It was absolutely amazing.

Straight men just can't imagine the bliss of being in a relationship with someone who finds farting as funny as they do.

A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.

Because society places a value on masculinity, gay men aspire to it. If you go to a gay club and the doorman says, 'You do realise this is a gay club, don't you lads?' you get all excited because you think, 'Wow, he thought I was straight!'