A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; a woman loses hers after four kisses.

He sailed through American history like a steel ship loaded with monoliths of granite.

One horse-laugh is worth ten thousand syllogisms. It is not only more effective; it is also vastly more intelligent.

Nature abhors a moron.

The kind of man who demands that government enforce his ideas is always the kind whose ideas are idiotic.

The trouble with Communism is the Communists, just as the trouble with Christianity is the Christians.

Some immemorial imbecilities have been added deliberately, on the ground that it is just as interesting to note how foolish men have been as to note how wise they have been.