It seems no matter what I read I think 'this is not Harry Potter.'

Why is it called Piggie-back riding? I'm not a piggie!

I'm also pretty impressive when I'm shoving the neck of a lute into someone's chest cavity.

Bravery is not strength in the face of a far lesser foe. Bravery is the exact opposite of that.

You may be wondering why there are words on my hands. That's because I'm a dork. And I'm gonna choose not to explain myself.

It seems no matter what I read I think 'this is not Harry Potter.'

But the truth of the matter is, to live a good life, as a good person, it doesn't matter how you got there. It just matters that you do.