I went and got a tire tool out of my truck, and straightened him out as cold as a block of ice. It was an attitude adjustment, and it'll work every time.

I'd love to spit some Beechnut in that dude's eye and shoot him with my ole forty-five.

I'd put Hank Williams picture on one hundred dollar bills.

You're singing a song about making love to your drummer, well gay guitar pickers don't turn me on.

I got girls that can cook, I got girls that can clean, I got girls that'll do anything between.

Why don't we all just get a long-neck?

After reading hundreds of e-mails, I have made MY decision. By pulling my opening Oct 3rd, You (ESPN) stepped on the Toes of The First Amendment Freedom of Speech, so therefore Me, My Song, and All My Rowdy Friends are OUT OF HERE. It's been a great run.