It's always fun when you see different comics at different weights or with different hair.

I wrote a lot of poetry in the last two years of high school, all about the same girl I was in love with. That was pretty awful. Did you know that in poetry, every line does not need to rhyme?

I don't look like a lot of fun. I just don't.

I never learned how to tie my shoes, and I was mocked for that. I still don't know how to.

There are some dogs that are gigantic that look like they shouldn't be in existence.

I'd love for someone to ask me about comedic technique and choices.

I have had vegan Thanksgiving of tofurkey and soy gravy. And it's not to say that Thanksgiving will ever justify the genocide of the Native Americans. But vegan Thanksgiving - that's just spitting on the graves, isn't it?