I tape over most of them with Corrie or Neighbours. Most of them are crap. They can f***ing make anyone look good. I signed Marco Boogers off a video. He was a good player but a nutter. They didn't show that on the video.

I've found myself on some days leaving home at three in the morning. I'm outside the training ground at five but they don't open up until seven. I'm just sitting there, listening to the radio.

I can't keep protecting people who don't want to run about and train, who are about three stone overweight. What am I supposed to keep saying? 'Keep getting your 60, 70 grand a week but don't train'? What's the game coming to?

I write like a two-year-old and I can't spell.

The only relaxed boss is Big Ron. He had me drinking pink champagne - before the match.

You come here to Anfield, you stand there and listen to that crowd, and it's the greatest sight in football.

Scholes was playing tiki-taka football when nobody in England knew what it was. He was another of those players, like Denis Law or Bobby Moore, who at 15 probably looked as if he wouldn't make it. Too small, you would think - can't run, dumpy little ginger nut - but then the ball would come to him and he would dazzle you. He was the best footballer in that Manchester United midfield, better than Ryan Giggs and Roy Keane.