That's what I am; I'm a drip. You still get hydrated, you still get your nutrients, just a little at a damn time.

I wish black people had a flag they could put into the ground, like when the troops stormed Iwo Jima.

You can't let people take advantage of you. Go get that ass.

This Italian restaurant I'm at is authentic! When they seat you, they give you a mustache.

Improv relies just as much on listening as it does you delivering dialogue. That's the hard for some people. Some people just concentrate on what they're going to say, and they're not listening. You have to listen in order to see where the other person is going to.

Let me tell about Tennessee. If your car breaks down in Tennessee, you have just moved to Tennessee.

My wife and I have been together for 11 years, and seven of those married. We got married on 07/07/07. We support each other 150 percent. We have fun. We are a modern-day Sonny & Cher. I don't sing. My wife sings. We're so different, but so alike. We got that ying and yang thing going on. You see it, but you don't know how it works.