Sometimes, when you get a girl pregnant, you blame the condom. His condom broke that night.

You gotta improvise in life. You gotta improv if the police pull you over.

Just broke up with somebody. Well, it wasn't really a break up, it was a booty call I might have took too serious.

I love to pitch things that I believe in and products that I love to use.

I think comedy evolves constantly. I reinvent myself all the time. I always find a way to entertain myself because I truly believe you have to entertain yourself in order to relate it the right way to your audience.

I try to dress smooth, I try to keep my face shaved, I try to keep my head cut. I try to do all the things to keep it smooth going!

There's book smart, there is street smart, there's relationship smart, there's too many different kinds of smarts to know all of them. Everybody doesn't know every kind of smart. There's money smart, there's movie smart, there's computer smart. There's just too many different kinds of smarts for people to know all the smarts.