Curb Your Enthusiasm set me up so perfectly. That was one of my favorite shows before I got on it. That started a whole different level of a story for me. I didn't know how to process it until after I got on the show and realized what the purpose of it was.

Sad when you spend more time trying to stay alive than living.

In my stand-up, I've always been loose. If there's a curtain onstage, I'll use that in my act. If there's a door, I'll use the door. I always like to use everything at my disposal, which makes each show a little different and a little more fun.

You know what I like? I like classic stuff. I like 'The Andy Griffith Show' - the variety of characters was so amazing to me.

I did a club one night - the speakers were old as hell. My jokes were coming out in black and white.

Damn! This flight attendant treating us like we won these first class tickets in a contest.

We came here to pick up chicks, not talk about dicks.