I'm big on facial expressions, and I'm big on mannerisms, which I find to be hilarious.

If a director brings a guy to their movie who does improv, they've got to let him do what he does - otherwise it's like bringing Michael Jordan to your basketball team and telling him to just pass the ball and don't shoot.

Just broke up with somebody. Well, it wasn't really a break up, it was a booty call I might have took too serious.

I have big hands. I can't do the touch-screen thing. I'm a button guy. I want to press buttons.

I've had jokes stolen a thousand times. But if you can do it better than me, you can have it. I've had jokes stolen from me in the club when I'm next on stage. And my brain will start to turn, and the gears will start turning, and I'll go onstage and create a whole new bit.

You got to start by doing little things if your quest is to take over the world.

I just always found it easier to be the same guy onstage as you are offstage.