There's no fool like an old fool --- you can't beat experience.

By the time a man can afford to lose a golf ball, he can't hit that far.

A vacation should be just long enough that your boss misses you, and not long enough for him to discover how well he can get along without you.

You know you're getting older when you don't care where your wife goes, just so you don't have to go along.

Whoever you are, there is some younger person who thinks you are perfect. There is some work that will never be done if you don't do it. There is someone who would miss you if you were gone. There is a place that you alone can fill.

Junior was being chided for his low grades. Little Robert, who lived a few doors away, was held up as an example. "Robert doesn't get C's and D's does he?" asked his father. "No," Junior admitted, "but he's different. He has very bright parents".

Marriage is like a violin. After the beautiful music is over, the strings are still attached.