Junior was being chided for his low grades. Little Robert, who lived a few doors away, was held up as an example. "Robert doesn't get C's and D's does he?" asked his father. "No," Junior admitted, "but he's different. He has very bright parents".

All work and no plagiarism makes a dull speech.

No woman is likely ever to be elected President - they never reach the required legal age.

By the time a man can afford to lose a golf ball, he can't hit that far.

Most of these love triangles are wrecktangles.

There's no fool like an old fool --- you can't beat experience.

Marriage is like a violin. After the beautiful music is over, the strings are still attached.