Muggs was always sorry, Mother said, when he bit someone, but we could never understand how she figured this out. He didn't act sorry.

The most dangerous food is wedding cake.

One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough.

I was seized by the stern hand of Compulsion, that dark, unreasonable Urge that impels women to clean house in the middle of the night.

I love the idea of there being two sexes, don't you?

Humor does not include sarcasm, invalid irony, sardonicism, innuendo, or any other form of cruelty. When these things are raised to a high point they can become wit, but unlike the French and the English, we have not been much good at wit since the days of Benjamin Franklin.

If I have sometimes seemed to make fun of Woman, I assure you it has only been for the purpose of egging her on.