Leaving your ears open to the suggestions of others only closes the mind's eye, thereby creating a type of spiritual glaucoma.

Last night, I went to a birthday party, and this girl brought a cake and a cheesecake. And the other girls that lived in the apartment, I swear to God, all night long: 'You're taking that cake with you when you go. That cake's not staying in this house.' Like it's this evil, Hope Diamond, nuclear, horrifying cursed thing.

You young people with your twittering and your creating of content. Or what is it - queefing? I don't know what you young people are calling it.

Sex is the quickest way to ruin a friendship.

I would say just in general, in life, I'm more willing to be animated as a person, and so obviously onstage as well.

I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things.

If you don't recognize the racist element in the teabag movement, you're either dishonest, or you've never seen the teabag movement, or heard of it, or been acquainted with it in any way.