Last time you called me late at night you were naked and chained to your shower curtain rod. I hope this isn't going to be disappointing.

I take in a lot of stuff from real life, movies, television, news and it all gets mixed in my head and somehow turns into a story idea.

Cute? I think my testosterone level just dropped - Ranger

That's one of the things I like about Mary Lou. She's willing to believe the worst about anyone.

Why do you give me cars?" "It's fun," Ranger said."And it keeps you safe. Do you want to know why keeping you safe is important to me?" "You love me?" "Yes." A sigh inadvertently escaped. "We're really screwed up, aren't we?" "In a very large way," Ranger said.

That might work," I said. "I'm good at faking it." This led to a couple moments of uncomfortable silence from both of us. "You didn't mean... ?" Morelli asked. "No. Of course not." "Never?" "Maybe once." His eyes narrowed. "Once?" "It's all that comes to mind. It was the time we were late for your Uncle Spud's birthday party." "I remember that. That was great. You're telling me you faked it?" "We were late! I couldn't concentrate. It seemed like the best way to go.

My father was in the kitchen putting a new washer in the kitchen faucet. He looked relieved to see Morelli standing in the hallway. He'd probably prefer I bring home someone useful, like a butcher or a car mechanic, but I guess cops are a step up from undertakers.