Having signed a few autographs in my time, I always wonder what the heck people do with them.

Ringo isn't the best drummer in the world. He isn't even the best drummer in the Beatles

They put up this bloke's picture on Crimewatch UK with a phone number and said 'Have you seen this man?' Well my auntie rang them up and said 'No'.

Laughter is the best medicine - unless you're diabetic, then insulin comes pretty high on the list.

There is no way in my right mind I would contemplate running 26 miles-plus unless it involved a chase with Pamela Anderson.

I've always been sensible with my money. I can't say I'm a business genius.

Having signed a few autographs in my time, I always wonder what the heck people do with them.