John Kerry met with Ralph Nader last week. Both sides of every issue were discussed. And then, Nader spoke.

Sen. Joe Biden, on the day of announcing his candidacy for president of the United States, called Barack Obama the first mainstream African-American who is articulate, bright, and . . . clean. I think we've seen the shortest presidential campaign in history.

If there isn't a parking space out front or I can't see my car from the window, we're eating somewhere else.

Here is a very inexpensive costume idea. Wear a re-elect Obama button and go out as a journalist.

More and more facts coming out about Osama bin Laden. You know, he never sleeps in the same place two nights in a row, just like Clinton.

President Bush's campaign is now attacking John Kerry for throwing away some of his medals to protest the Vietnam War. Bush did not have any medals to throw away, but in his defense he did have all his services records thrown out.

Did you see Walker's father? 'My son loves America.' Yeah, like O.J. loved his wife.