Today the Secretary of State said that of the 247 candidates, so far 115 of them have been certified. How embarrassing is that? Imagine if you were turned down because you didn't meet the high standards set by Larry Flynt and Gallagher.

When you work with your hands, you learn to appreciate how easy it is to earn money talking.

Major heat wave in India - 122 degrees today. It was so hot people in India were sweating like Americans waiting to hear if their job is being outsourced to India.

It seems that England's royal family is running out of money. They are down to just $1.6 million. Well sure, that's what happens when nobody in your family has had a job for the last thousand years.

New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive.

The Bush administration said today there is a lot of support for us to attack Iraq. Exxon, Mobil, Texaco, Chevron, they're all lining up.

The other night, President Bush's press conference was pre-empted by 'American Idol.' You know the difference between President Bush and 'American Idol?' See, on 'American Idol,' the one with the most votes wins.