The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up.

If you're a gunfighter, you like to die in the street.

Barack Obama's mother-in-law might be moving into the White House with him. Joe Biden was right. Hostile forces will test him in the first few months.

When Clinton said he was going to create 8 million new jobs, I didn't think they were all going to be tax collectors.

New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive.

John McCain said that Barack Obama is already measuring the drapes in the White House. That's what he said. I understand Sarah Palin is already driving McCain around to look at assisted living facilities.

John Kerry speaks French fluently. Democrats are saying he's one in a million. A war hero who speaks French, isn't it more like one in a trillion?