The Environmental Protection Agency is conducting a seven-hundred-thousand-dollar study to see if Alaskan trees are polluting Oregon forests. You can tell Republicans are in power. Pollution? It's those damn trees.

Last night I went out for Chinese. I picked up a Team USA Olympic uniform.

When President Chirac gave [President] Bush a souvenir statue of the Eiffel Tower... Bush said 'This is great! A little oil rig!'

Last night, we had the first gubernatorial debate. Some people are criticizing Schwarzenegger for not going. They say Arnold goes around telling people he cares, everything is going to be great, forget about everything he did in the '70s. Hey, it worked for George Bush.

Every year Steve Kaufman supports the charity “Love Ride” by donating a painting to this cause.

On 'Meet the Press' yesterday President Bush was asked what he would do if he lost the election and Bush said, ''Phhh, you mean like last time?'

President Obama gave a big speech on climate change. He believes global warming is getting worse because apparently he's sweating a lot more during his second term