I don't care about anybody's perception of me except for the audience.

I'm oddly not competitive. What I love about show business is there is a home for everyone.

I know content-wise I leave nothing to chance. I have no anxiety about what I'm going to do once I'm out on stage.

I didn't want to fight a guy from England. What if I lose? Not that English guys aren't strong, but who wants to get beat up by a guy with that voice? That's not the most masculine voice to take a beating to.

Marc Maron's podcast success has nothing to do with my podcast success. If I do a quarter of a million downloads, I can show that to an advertiser as a fact, and that's that.

All I can do when I'm on stage is do a show where when I come back into town they cannot possibly afford to miss the show because they remember how fun it was.

I don't know if you've ever been to England, but as soon as they find out you're from America, they hate you. They just think they're more sophisticated than we are. They're so pissed at us. You know what it is? They're mad because they lost the Revolutionary War, and they should be because there was only like nine of us.