The jokes were perfect! Then George Carlin started talking about the seven dirty words you can't say on television, then it evolved into social commentary.

George Carlin put it best. He said, "My old act was so easy to do because there was so little of me in it."

Marc Maron's podcast success has nothing to do with my podcast success. If I do a quarter of a million downloads, I can show that to an advertiser as a fact, and that's that.

Joan Rivers is 80 and she's fantastic. She lives in mortal fear of not filling that 1,500-seat room.

I wasn't the guy everyone liked. I was the guy that wouldn't shut up.

There was never a moment in George Carlin's career where he dipped below an A+. When he came out with the "Hippie Dippie Weatherman" on The Tonight Show, I mean, it seems so mundane now, but it was in black and white TV and the whole bit was that this guy smoked tons of grass and was a terrible weather man. "Forecast for tonight? Dark."

If a waiter or waitress tells me when gratuity is included they automatically get more gratuity. When they hide it I go with the leg kick.