If it doesn't know what to charge you for nosebleed seats, your team sucks.

If it's going to really make them happy for me to do it, I'll do Walken. I've got no problem with it at all.

It's always a job when you're the reason they're assembling. If you're just doing shows and you're on a lineup with eight other guys, it's fun, it's great.

You could teach [George] Carlin in college. It's the construction of the word and the order of things and how they go. How all those sentences are timed perfectly.

My act now is completely different. I took two years off when I first got with my wife and it was because my old act was all about "Where's the party after this?" I was humping the stool and it's all so disgusting and I was miserable, miserable in a lifeless angry marriage. Then I met my wife and I was completely happy. Like a snake that sheds its skin. I just got rid of all of that negativity.

It doesn't hurt my voice or anything because some impressions tear my throat apart. [Christophen] Walken is easy; I can do it in my sleep. They all know it by heart. I did it on The Simpsons. I'm surprised that people still want to hear it.

I never minded George Steinbrenner spending obscene amounts of money to put the best product on the field.