My parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles were all funny, and I felt that energy, that delivery, that timing, that sarcasm. All that stuff seeped into my brain.

It's very rare that an older comedian sort of slips into an old-school clunker. You know, you don't hear too much of that anymore.

Sometimes during my set I invite volunteers up on stage to get speed-roasted and I'm worried that I may have hundreds of people rushing the stage all at once. Luckily I'm a black belt in karate and I can fend them off.

In Boston where community policing is so important, they don't necessarily have to like each other, but they know each other. The cops in Boston make it their business to get out of their vehicles, to engage the public, to walk around the neighborhoods. They live in the community that they police. And I think these things help.

I would vote for you for President but I'm against big government.

I like to roast things from the inside out. I like to know what's going on.

Instead of running for President, why don’t you try walking on a treadmill?