Charlie Sheen is to stand-up what Larry Flynt is to standing up.
I usually have sex to my stand-up comedy album. Power move.
I would vote for you for President but I'm against big government.
South Park called...they want their everything back.
I can't defend someone else's jokes. I can only defend my jokes, and I have to live with my own jokes.
Before you can be all deprecating it's helpful to be self-deprecating.