You never know anymore if you'll see something you don't want to see, if you're jealous of something, if you're going through a breakup and you see something, so I just don't even look at those things any more [ in Instagram].

I find it actually the height of romance to legally bind yourself to someone because you're really taking care of someone, and letting them take care of you. I actually have no cynicism about that.

Admittedly, the masturbation story is just a "Hey, this is one of my best-of's, I'll throw it in the special." But the grandmother stuff, really, I feel like is part of the theme and part of the best way to end the story that I'm telling with the special.

My curriculum would be the whole year. It would be really slow and it would be about human anatomy. I would teach people about women's bodies so they understand what Planned Parenthood is for.

I don't even think people really understand how you can get pregnant or when you get pregnant. I still have questions about that.

I have no interest in saying "This is who I am! This is what I'm like!"

I just remember a creepy sex-ed teacher putting a banana on a condom and then saying, "It goes in the girl if she gets all juicy." We didn't even believe it. We were like, "Well, that's weird."