The best thing about being 45 is not taking myself so seriously.

No, it's not a 'corpse thing.' I feel I lack the emotional capacity to deal with those in mourning.

This is terrific! What fun! Maybe tomorrow I can go to the prom with my brother. The day after, perhaps I can wear white pants and unexpectedly get my period.

I’m instantly mortified by my fat, uncontrollable mouth, but that’s when it occurs to me that my humor is a self-defense mechanism. Even though I may come off like a stark raving asshat, being funny is the most important tool I have to stay sane. The ability to say what I think is the key to allowing me to feel in control.

Point? Maybe you aren't a Carrie or a Samantha or a Charlotte or a Miranda. Maybe you're just you.

Owning a dog is slightly less expensive than being addicted to crack.

No matter how happy anyone is with their choices, I believe it's human nature to wonder about the path not taken.