Were I forced to describe this woman in one word, that word would be...herpes.

You know what it was like? It was like thinking I was heading to a surprise party and instead it was a surprise pap smear.

Despite my best efforts, I'm not quite perfect. Let's just say I'm like one of those Hopi blankets where they leave a tiny flaw so as to not affront the Lord.

I've always been able to cook Italian food. That's in my blood because I'm half Sicilian.

I still believe in the Holy Trinity, except now it's Target, Trader Joe's, and IKEA.

I yearn to be a woman of more depth, but I'm not so fond of the path I'd need to follow to get there.

I think people tend to be very myopic and they dont understand how their actions impact others.