I don't recommend washing your face. Because you might drown.

There’s no cure for ugly, but you can make yourself into a human optical illusion.

You become yourself, every single day of your life, through your choices and how you think.

You've already got a natural glow, kind of of, cuz you're drunk, so just make it like way more intense, everybody loves someone who's so red in the face. Are you embarrassed? No, I'm just excited to be here. I'm normal, I swear. Do you want my phone number?

So you don't have time for concealer, you have time for powder for when you start crying later about how some boy doesn't like you.

If you have something floating in your drink, then you know you're ready. Seriously, what's in my drink? Aliens. Still gonna drink it.

As weird and awful and terrible as it may seem to be yourself sometimes, it will always reward you.