As a rule, wearing a bigger pair of jeans looks better than squishing yourself into a pair of jeans that used to fit before you gave up smoking.
I am best viewed from a distance.
Family is the one thing that is definitely not disposable.
I can't stand folk who are all snobby about reality TV.
I have always had a need for attention but didn't plan to be a comic.
I can eat a man, but I'm not sure of the fiber content.