Dating is pressure and tension. What is a date, really, but a job interview that lasts all night?
Jerry SeinfeldResponsible, who wants to be responsible? Whenever something bad happens, it's always, who's responsible for this?
Jerry SeinfeldPeople don't think of their office as a workplace anymore. They think of it as a stationary store with Danish. You want to get your pastry, your envelopes, your supplies, your toilet paper, six cups of coffee, and you go home.
Jerry SeinfeldAny day you had gym class was a weird school day. It started off normal. You had English, Social Studies, Geometry, then suddenly your in Lord of the Flies for 40 minutes. Your hanging from a rope, you have hardly any clothes on, teachers are yelling at you, kids are throwing dodge balls at you and snapping towels - you're trying to survive. And then it's Science,Language, and History. Now that is a weird day.
Jerry Seinfeld