People should get married because they have finally seen the folly of being single: "Oh, this is all just kind of a bad magic trick. I just keep bending over to reach for this wallet on a string. How much longer am I gonna do that?"

I like definitive things.

When someone does a small task beautifully, their whole environment is affected by it.

Of course, everyone wants to be healthy. The amusing thing is no one's really sure how to do it.

Fear of success is one of the new fears I've heard about lately. And I think its definitely a sign that we're running out of fears. A person suffering from fear of success is scraping the bottom of the fear barrel.

Fatherhood makes you cute. Women find bumbling fathers cute and attractive.

I had a dream last night that a hamburger was eating me.