Sometimes you can do certain things on stage, or even in a TV series, and people see the look on your face and they know what you mean, so you can get away with certain things. But if you can't create that look on an animated character, which is essentially a puppet, the line will hit the audience in a very bad way.

I was in the drug store the other day trying to get a cold medication...Not easy. There's an entire wall of products you need. You stand there going,"Well, this one is quick acting but this is long lasting...Which is more important, the present or the future?"

I can't go to a bad movie by myself. What, am I gonna make sarcastic remarks to strangers?

See, the thing of it is, there's a lot of ugly people out there walking around but they don't know they're ugly because nobody actually tells them.

Well, Howard Stern has been doing his impression of me for years. It doesn't really bother me.

Well, all comedy starts with anger. You get angry, and its never for a good reason, right? You know its not a good reason. And then you try and work it from there.

You can measure distance by time. 'How far away is it?' 'Oh about 20 minutes.' But it doesn't work the other way. 'When do you get off work?' 'Around 3 miles.'