Russia has two bases outside of Russia. America has 178 military bases throughout the world. Who's the aggressor?

'The David Letterman Show' is a show of comedy.

In February 2003, I signed a three-year contract with MSNBC to host a talk show. Having recently decided not to run again for governor of Minnesota, I was still a pretty hot commodity. The show was originally scheduled for an hour, four nights a week.

I'm the only person in the world that, when he holds down two jobs, gets criticized for it; everyone else gets a pat on the back and say, 'What an entrepreneuring, hardworking person,' but apparently that doesn't apply to me.

Monsanto can do anything they want to you, and put anything they want into your foods. There's nothing you can do about it.

Okay, fluoride in the water to help our teeth. Well, shouldn't that be the job of your mom and dad? To teach you how to brush your teeth and use mouth wash? What do we need the government to do it for? Clearly, what a scam. Fluoride in the water.

People don't like politicians.