People always assume that bachelors are single by choice and spinsters because nobody asked them. It never enters their heads that poor bachelors might have worn the knees of their trousers out proposing to girls who rejected them or that a girl might deliberately stay unmarried.

Always be nice to everyone in the firm on the way up. You never know who you may meet on the way down.

Never drink black coffee at lunch; it will keep you awake all afternoon.

hurting other people is not excusable because you've been hurt yourself.

in a village you can't sack or fight with someone, as you'll find yourself stuck beside them in the hairdresser's next morning.

If you feel compelled to give a New Year's Eve party, don't invite people to arrive too early or they'll go off the boil before midnight.

People who can write a book usually do.