How come nobody wants to argue with me? Is it because I'm always so right?
You're only as smart as your ERA.
Statistics are about as interesting as first base coaches.
A lot of long relievers are ashamed to tell their parents what they do. The only nice thing about it is that you get to wear a uniform like everbody else.
Opening day -- or Opening Day. Depending on how you feel about it.
It never hurts to apologize, especially if you don't mean it.