Other people's children's birthday parties are the most joyful events you will ever resent having to attend.

The hardest part of the day is all the stuff after I open my eyes in the morning.

I feel guilty if I'm not reading books, but I read scripts of movies or things that I know I'm committed to that I'm going to do the project. I tell myself, "I'm going to read this script like six times," and I only read it the initial time.

There is this false perception that comedians can never be serious. It's like from like the era of court jesters.

The idea of being a practicing Catholic, it's - for me, it's like - I need a lot of practice, you know what I mean?

When I'm in touch with the idea that there is a higher power and that there is, you know, other factors at work, it - it kind of quells my narcissism.

Failing and laughing at your own shortcomings are the hallmarks of a sane parent.