You ever talk about a movie with someone that read the book? They're always so condescending. 'Ah, the book was much better than the movie.' Oh really? What I enjoyed about the movie: no reading.
Jim GaffiganGyms are always packed. The only machine available is the one that simulates the gynecological exam. You know, the Sharon Stone machine.
Jim GaffiganI was looking at a bottle of water; they have nutritional facts printed on the side. You know, I'm no chemist, but I have a rough idea what's in water.
Jim Gaffigan