Wouldn't it have been weird to go to high school with the Pope? You know, somebody did, someone's sitting at home, watching TV in Poland, they see the Pope, they think, "That guy was a jerk! He was so mean to me and now he's Pope? I got a swirly from the Pope!"

My faith is very personal. It's not something that I want to project on other people.

There is the vegetarian Hot Pocket for those of us who don't want to eat meat, but would still like diarrhea.

Most of my material is , it doesn't necessarily involve a lot of editing. So even the show with the World Meeting of Families in Philadelphia, I don't have to worry about some of the material being inappropriate.

I reached a point in my life where I didn't really like who I was.I was married to an amazing woman. I had children, and yet there was frustration.

Manhattan's probably one of the bluest parts in the country, and Indiana's definitely one of the redder states. I have sympathy for both sides.

I didn't think that it's something that would happen. I didn't think I would be in the position, emotionally or financially, to be able to do that. But I've been lucky [to have big family].