When you hear bacon cooking....that sizzling sound isn't the fat cooking....that's applause.

Don't you think it's strange how many referees work at Footlocker?

Ever eat so much you feel sick? Isn't that the best?

I love writing stand-up so much and tinkering and looking for ideas.

I smoke crack. I get all my dancers together and we do a prayer.

I do have some Catholic stuff that is done from the perspective of an ignorant Catholic. But other than that, topic-wise, there's nothing really filthy.

I would say some of the food I talk about that I really enjoy, like cake and bacon, I eat a lot less than I portray in my act. But that stuff that I dislike, it's pretty sincere.