I spent most of my adult life essentially agnostic or an atheist.

My wife told me that in the Bible, Abraham circumcised himself... wow! I can't even get to the bank before it closes.

I'm afraid of a couple things. I'm afraid of getting caught up in other people's expectations, because I feel like that's an ongoing battle.

Actually, the reason I look like this is because my father was from Sweden and my mother was Elton John.

I think comedians get too much credit or too much criticism for the style of comedy they do, and they generally do the style of comedy that works for them. [...] There's no kind of shrewd calculation going into the type of standup we all do. It's like David Cross is supposed to be doing the David Cross' type of standup.

I am single, I don't drink. It's kind of hard to get a woman buzzed when you don't drink. You'll be like, "Yeah, I'll have a glass of water, you want a shot of Jäger? You want eight of 'em?"

We tend to outdo ourselves.